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I Am A Parrothead First, An Anprim Second, White Third

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I’m turning the tables. ladies if you want a shot with me you need to have all your Tilikum lore and fun facts down.

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@evan their sugar free variety is also nice in a radically different direction.

@evan So good you take them even when you feel fine. Good thing Aspirin hasn't caught on.

teen who's angry at their parents and goes to slam their bedroom door but they live in a scooby doo mansion and just come out another door and have to angrily and awkwardly walk through doors like 12 more times before they can be alone

The fun part of taking a tums? well it's the flavor and the crunch.. the texture is also a big contributor. not sure there's another candy OR drug on the market that compares.

I should note that regardless of the results i will still be Smooth Sailing tonight

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@evan tums neutralize acid, but also cause the production of more, it's no good if you don't already have too much acid

@evan calcium is good for bones but too much can give you kidney stones. so it's impossible to say if it's bad or good

taking tums recreationally (when there is either no medical need for them or an anticipated but not confirmed need), the process also known as “smooth sailing”:

armie hammer still method acting from sorry to bother you

hey babe lets... enhance the mood. smooth sailing. stomach insurance (i pull out a large container of tums for recreational use)

looking expectantly at evan and rico for approval: more like bowel movement bendis, amirite

“Because it is our birthday and she come see me- ah!”

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confused anime guy's choices:

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