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"clean your jeans!"

Yeah I did. You tell me where the spaghetti-o's were

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doing a lot of very complicated mathematics on a chalkboard trying to invent a way to refer to women in casual conversation which has even more fucked vibes than calling them "females"

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how does that clearly-a-scam send one book get 10 books back thing work

how does that clearly-a-scam send one book get 10 books back thing work

4 people on 3 continents in 2 languages have referred to me as a “human hummingbird”

remembering when an all white acapella group at my college sang ultralight beam and got their collective asses cancelled so hard

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I'm gonna try and get the phrase "wacky vacky" to catch on while I'm at the vaccine supersite this weekend

sex ment 

I do like to read hanky code cards sometimes and be really rude and judgemental about other peoples sexual proclivities

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Courtesy of my Instagram ads, it’s Ally Pants™️, For Men!®️

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i am frankly amazed that I listed to Animal Kingdom no fewer than 100 times (at work mostly, i wasnt the one putting it on) without picking up on the fact that this boy is trans. im listening to the album alone now and wow wow wow wow its incredible

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ah yes, i would absolutely love to waste my time writing a letter adulating the generosity of a bunch of old dead rich fucks, thanking them for giving me literally no money

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I made an early appointment to donate blood because when I show up at like 1, there is always only one donut left and it's always just plain glazed, and if I come in at 10:15 and there aren't any donuts I am going to become the freaking joker, watch this space

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the only real problem with cancel culture is that it's unregulated. in the past we've seen it go against people like Benedict Cumberbatch, with is clearly homophobic (because of Johnlock, obviously) and J.K. Rowling (people who are just jocks clearly, being a Potterhead is a clear signifier of woke political test usually). No, what we need is government-sanctioned and led fandom coalitions, think of it! If Joe Biden gave the BTS Army legal jurisdiction to cancel people (cont.)

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can anyone rec me music made by trans men thank you

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